Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Put up new song le. Dunno why the hosting website i am using was a bit siao for a few days. Cant upload anything at all. Finally got it to work liao....
Very tired and feeling very down these 2 days. Quarrelled with my mom over some stuff. Actually I never talked back to her even once in my life before that. Usually when she starts scolding, I just shut up and let her continue. But that day, I felt that I just cant take it anymore, so I reasoned out with her. In the end, she said some stuff that really hurt me... All these time, I thought she finally understand me more and that we can now communicate better as compared to when I was younger. I was just being naive and think too beautifully.... Ialways thought my parents knew me. I always thought that I was being a good girl to the best that I could. I like to stay out late with my friends to party or stuff... Those whom I hang out with usually will noe that but because I noe my mom doesn't like it, so I will usually decline my fren's invitation to go clubbing... my mom doesn't noe that, but I do. But it seems like she find it that I always go out whenever my frens ask me out. I dun...
I'm not perfect... I noe that... I do have my own secrets... who doesn't? But I make sure I try not to do things that will make them worry... I dunno what I am like in other people eyes, I dunno if they see me as a bad girl... I dun really mind that much... But words like that coming from my parents cuts deep into me... I din noe that I am like a bad girl to them... I never did... I noe they support me financially, for me to be able to grow up happily and to pursue a good education. I am terribly grateful for that and I can see what they have done all these years for me... But saying that outright in my face.... I really dunno how to reply...
I'm weak... I feel so cold and alone suddenly... I feel like a door has just slammed shut right in my face. Tears have dried... Words has already been said... It can never be taken back... I need time to lick my wounds once again...
3:22 PM
